Ode to Technology

Yesterday was bad but you made it much worse,
You’re Satan, you’re evil – just one big curse.
When you make your own rules and don’t tell me why,
I get lost and confused and die a bit inside.

Constantly quitting of your own accord,
Creates delays in my work that I just can’t afford.
Yes, Wednesdays are hard and we’re all a bit shit,
But at some point you just need to get on with it!

Gosh you’re annoying and frankly quite bitchy,
When you get in a huff and start to get glitchy.
Maybe it’s just that you hate my guts,
Or do you find it funny to make me go nuts?

There must be others, who you torture as well,
Making their day a complete living hell.
We should start a support group that meets over lunch,
With a hostage computer that we can all punch.

You’ve forced my hand; here’s my solution:
To fully embrace the tech revolution.
You may felt like you’ve won, but let me be clear:
When the new model’s released, you’re so outta here.

MacRumours.com tells me I don’t have long to wait,
Until you, computer friend, are out of date.
And you there, slow iPhone are not so safe yourself,
There’s about to be an iPhone 6 upon the shelf.

Bet you wish you’d been much more kind,
Too late! You’re a paperweight from September nine.
So be warned, technology: next time you crash,
You and your error message will end up in trash.